The Journey Begins

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

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Tonight I talked with my teenager about depression. He said, “Do you want to leave us? Don’t you care about us?”

I wasn’t clear what he meant at first, then it dawned on me–he equated depression with suicidal. I calmly explained that while a suicidal person was most likely always depressed, a depressed person wasn’t necessarily suicidal.

Of course then he asked why I’m depressed. In October last year, out of the clear blue sky, I was diagnosed with an Orbital pseudotumor. It’s behind my left eye. The doctors have been treating me for it ever since: high-dose steroids, chemo, even a risky biopsy.

At times the pain is crushing. The side effects from the drugs are brutal. And, the knowledge that there is no cure, that I’m never getting better, is more than I can deal with some days. So, yes. I get depressed. If I wasn’t depressed I’d be delusional.